A lesson in patience for me...

So the last few weeks have been a bit draining to say the least.  All 3 of the kids have been sick at least once, Kellen actually got sick two times.  On top of that Chad and I have also been sick...needless to say I have been a bit tired, so have the kids.  A tired mommy and tired kids = a crabby mommy :(  Anyone relate?  Anyway, I was getting ready this morning after already breaking up several fights between Elijah and Hannah, thinking to myself "Is it really only Tuesday?!  How am I going to make it through the rest of this week?  Lord, please help me.  I don't want to be crabby with my kids.  I really want to enjoy our time together, but right now they are driving me a little nutso :) "  Then the Lord kindly reminded me of something He has shown me before, that I forgot.  But once I put into practice it really changed my day around.  I'm sharing it because it really has helped me and I'm hoping it helps someone else too.  God was teaching me a little bit about patience, which with children is a lesson you begin to learn very quickly, and can sometimes be a daily lesson :)  Anyway, I found myself praying for more patience several times a day.  Especially when Hannah and Elijah were both in diapers, and both totally dependent on me for everything.  God began to speak to my heart about where patience comes from ( at least for this mommy ).  He lead me to 1 Corinthians 13:4, which says "Love is patient, love is kind."  Love IS patient!  God began to show me that my problem was not that I was just short on patience, but rather short on love.  Hang in here with me for a bit, and let me explain.  Of course I love my children, and there is a love a parent has for a child that is unexplainable at times.  But I am human, with limitations.  Even the best moms loose their patience and get frustrated with their children, because we are human!  But there is one who's love is truly unconditional, not bound by human limitations or emotions or hormones....hello!  A love that is so beautiful and whole that sometimes I can't even begin to comprehend how awesome it is.  And I know that it is real, because I have encountered it and it changes me every time!  God's love.  I think the thought of God's love sometimes trips us up a little bit, at least it has me.  Because I am too tempted to compare God's love to the love I receive from my human relationships.  A love that at times can be conditional, and can disappoint at time.  I am no expert on love, or God.  And I'm just learning how to study the bible, but I saw this piece of scripture that I think adds to what God is showing me. 1 John 4:16 says, "And so we know and rely on the love God has for us.  God is love.  Whoever lives in love lives in God and God in him."  God is love!  Love is not just something that God shows us, or gives us.  Love is who God is, God is love.  He can't not love because that is who He is!!!  And not just what our human perspective of love is, but a perfect, unconditional love that never fails.  So what God showed me was that if I am feeling drained and flat out of patience, instead of just praying for more patience, I need to pray "God fill me up with your love.  Let it be your love that flows out of me to my kids!"  Since love is patient and kind, when you are full of God's love and begin to pour it out to your kids, or spouse, it will be patient and kind!!  So, I did that this morning, I prayed just that, and it is amazing how God turned my attitude and day around!!!  I am also learning that taking the time out of my day, meaning getting up before my kids, to spend time with God in His Word is the best way to "fill up".  And I have found the days that I do that, I don't feel so drained by the end of the day.  I have more energy and lots of love to pour out!
Anyway, like I said I'm certainly no expert.  I am learning as I go, but I just thought this was too cool not to pass along.  I hope it encourages you today!

Choosing Joy!

Last week I watched helplessly as my 4 year old daughter, Hannah, came down with a really awful virus that developed quickly into croup.  All of the sudden she was coughing so hard she couldn't breathe.  I don't know if there is anything worse as a parent than to see your child so sick, and struggling to breathe.  We have watched all 3 of our children go through this at some point.  Elijah with his asthma, and Kellen right after he was born.  Its a horrible feeling as a parent to see that.  Oh, how it makes your heart ache.  I took Hannah immediately into the bathroom, shut the door and turned on a hot shower, and we steamed for about 10-15 mins.  The next morning we were in the doctors office for an emergency breathing treatment with epinephrine to open up her airways.  We watched her fever go as high as 103.5, causing her to be a little bit delirious, talking about things that we didn't understand.  As I sat on the couch that evening, my heart aching for my little girl, wanting to do something, anything to try to help her.  But there was nothing else we could do.  Her body just had to work through it.  I was praying for her silently when the thought of the crucifixion and death of Jesus entered my mind.  I began to think about God sending His one and only Son to earth knowing the excruciating pain that he would face.  It was a reminder to me of just how much God loves us.  He knew that the only way for us to be saved, for us to be together, would be to send His only Son, Jesus, to painfully take on all of the sin of humanity.  God watched as they beat him, and hung him on the cross with nails in his hands and feet, and watched him struggle to breathe as he hung on the cross.  I was reminded that God does know our pains, our sorrows, our struggles.  He knows the difficulties we face as parents.  Peace began to wash over me as I could feel the love of my God and my Saviour wrap His arms around me.  It was almost as if I heard him say "It's OK.  I understand your heartache.  But fret not my love, for I have overcome the world.  I have defeated the power of death. Fear not, for I am with you. I will bring you through this. Rest in my love tonight and be restored."
I think so many times we allow ourselves to so overwhelmed with our current circumstances that we forget what Jesus did for us!  Because he died and rose again, we can walk in victory, we can overcome every single day!  Even if the circumstances don't change, or things don't go the way we would like them to, we can rest in His love and be restored daily, knowing that God loves us.  He sees us.  He knows what we are going through, and He is right there just waiting for us to ask for Him.  We can choose to walk in peace and joy no matter what we are facing!  That is the true freedom of Christ!  But it is a choice.  It is not something that always comes easily.  Sometimes we just don't feel like it, and it would be easier to feel sorry for ourselves and allow discouragement to settle in.  But with Jesus, we have the choice to overcome.  Stand up, believe and receive the freedom that Christ so mercifully and graciously has given to us!  I'm choosing peace and joy today, and everyday!